Thursday Thirteen: Old-time Riddles

Conundrums from the early 1900s

1. If a chicken said anything, why would it be likely to swear?
Because it could only use fowl language.

2.What is the best thing to do if you split your sides with laughter?
Run until you get a stitch in them.

3. Why is a dirty boy like a piece of cheap flannel?
Because they both shrink from washing.

4. Why is the number 9 like a peacock?
Because it would be nothing without its tail.

5. Which is quicker, heat or cold?
Heat is, because you can catch cold.

6. Why were the Middle Ages called dark ages?
Because there were so many (k)nights.

7. Why did the fly fly?
Because the spider spied her.

8. Why do you always find a lost object in the very last place where you look?
Because when you find it, you stop looking for it.

9. Why is a straw hat like a kiss over the telephone?
Because it is not felt.

10. Why is a watch like a river?
Because it will not run long without winding.

11. Why is the letter D like a squalling baby?
Because it makes Ma mad ("ma"-d).

12. Why is there no such thing as a perfect day?
Because every day begins by breaking.

13. Why is a fishmonger ungenerous?
Because his job makes him sell fish (selfish).

From Party Games For All Occasions by Bernard Stanley. Published in Philadelphia by J. B. Lippincott Company, copyright date unknown.

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"Peacock and Peahen" by Maruyama Ōkyo (1747 - 1821)
Image from Wikimedia Commons