Mind games
My son Isaac works part-time as a stock person in a grocery store, and he sometimes talks about "cranky old people". Usually, he's frustrated that they've scolded him about things that are totally outside his control.
At my job today, I met one of Isaac's "cranky old people". I asked a white-haired fellow if I could help him with anything, and he launched into a passionate complaint about my misleading labels.
My labels? I was taken aback, but when he paused, I spoke as politely as I could. "I'm sorry it's confusing, sir," I said. "I will pass along your complaint, but the store really has no control over that product's labels. The packages and the information that's printed on them come from the manufacturer."
My words only made him angrier. He spat out a few more paragraphs about "my" labels and "my" sizes and "my" products and "my" store, and I stood there meekly and heard him out. Finally he bought the only thing we had that resembled what he really wanted, and strode away, a thin, stiff, angry, elderly man.
This incident reminded me of my mother-in-law, who is now in her mid-90s. For the past few years (since breaking a hip), Mama N. has lived in an assisted-living home. She doesn't go out to shop anymore, which is probably just as well. The last few times I shopped with her, she had conversations with clerks that were quite similar to the one I had this morning.
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| Portrait of a Elderly Lady (Mary Cassatt) |
If I make it through another decade or two, I hope that I don't go paranoid in the process. Being suspicious all the time surely must be exhausting. And it makes a person cranky, which certainly is hard on other folks.
7 comments:
Throw in the lack of patience and the difficulty hearing, and it's not a pretty picture.
When I lived in FL we were surrounded by older people. Some were as sweet as could be, some were not. I always tried to have patience with them because I figured they might have other issues that made them act that way. A lot of them were just down right rude. One time this older man walked past all of us standing in line at the movies and just cut in front. Most people didn't say anything, but a few did. I kind of felt sorry for the man, not because he was old, but because of his thought process. I just could not image in a million years doing something like he did. It's hard some times to have patience, I know the older I get the less I seem to have. But I just keep thinking of that man at the movies and try really hard not to treat others as he treated all of us. :)
Well, lots of old people aren't unreasonably cranky, thank goodness. I mean, if they're cranky, they have a rational reason for feeling as they do and accept a rational solution, explanation, or apology.
I have lots of senior customers every day, and most of them are really nice people. I enjoy them.
Miss Genevieve: I have only recently started exploring blogs and had been drawn to yours through our work website. It is exactly as I pictured!! Wonderful, gentle and flows like a tiny stream of water n my hand. Thank you for sharing your insights and stories.
I'm not much of an activist here. I figure people can read about current events on a million different websites.
Sometimes I wonder if being "cranky" is a result of the person's pain level. Alot of older pp suffer with arthritus and other very painful dilemas. And other times I wonder if it is a fact of them losing "control" of certain areas of thweir lives. Just a thought.....
I agree, Sunny. Endless pain and dwindling independence are both states that one must experience to really understand. There's certainly no universal reason that people are irritable.
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