Thirteen Amish Proverbs

Collected from my Amish cookbooks

I've bought several Amish cookbooks at local Mennonite stores over the years. All of these cookbooks are from the "Pennsylvania Dutch" country of Pennsylvania and Ohio. Like many church cookbooks, they include some pithy bits of advice for living, in addition to the recipes. Here's a "Thursday Thirteen" sample of some of the proverbs.

1. There are just as good fish in the sea as ever were caught.
2. A barking dog seldom bites.
3. Bend the sapling before it's too late.
4. A smooth tongue often hides sharp teeth.
5. Easy got, soon spent.
6. It's a poor hunter who does not always have one barrel loaded.
7. Use it up, wear it out, make do, or do without.
8. The laborer is worthy of his hire.
9. If you swear while fishing, you won't catch anything.
10. Girls with fat cheeks have hearts like flint.
11. It is easier to fall than to get up.
12. The old bull keeps on bellowing.
13. When lost in the woods, look up a tree.

Numbers 8 through 13 must be classics. Each one of them appears in several of my cookbooks, with both the "Dutch" version and the English translation.

You might enjoy some of the other Thursday Thirteens around the web today.

WPA tourism poster. depicting an Amish family

1920 Rules for Health and Beauty for Girls

Advice for girls by Maude Foote Crow

My mother was born in 1923. By the time she was a teenager in the late 1930s, some rules in this list might have already seemed a bit old-fashioned. Still, many of these rules are still sound advice today.

Bodily Carriage

• Hold the head erect.
• Keep the chest high.
• Hold the abdomen in.
• Rest the weight of the body on the balls of the feet.
• Keep this position constantly, by day and by night.
• When lying down, stretch out; do not curl up.

Growing Older

Accepting what you cannot change

An old woman feeding birds in Kazimierz
the old Jewish district in Krakow, Poland.
Photo from Wikimedia Commons.

I clipped this stanza of verse from an old book, because this is how I would prefer to grow old -- with a zest for living.

At sixty-two life is begun;
At seventy-three begin once more.
Fly swifter as you near the sun,
And brighter shine at eighty-four.
At ninety-five
Shouldst thou arrive,
Still wait on God, and work and thrive.

Uncredited poet, quoted by Mrs. Henry Ward Beecher, in All Around the House, or, How to Make Homes Happy. Published in New York, 1881, by D. Appleton and Co.

That's upbeat, don't you think? But apparently, the book's author, Mrs. Henry Ward Beecher, thought it was an inadequate,  shallow vision of old age.

In a long, depressing commentary that follows the poem, Mrs. Beecher says that old age is often not the easy experience envisioned in the poem. She describes how someone can be doing very well as they clip along through life. Then, suddenly and unexpectedly, a serious illness can transform robust maturity into helpless dependency.

Mrs. Beecher concludes her lament with this paragraph:

But to be stopped in the midst of usefulness and stricken down helpless — to become a burden where once one was most looked to for help — to meet this mysterious dispensation with patience and courage, and, without a murmur, cheerfully wait God's own good time — is an attainment which none acquire but those who live near to Heaven — whose "life is hid with Christ in God."

Mrs. Henry Ward Beecher, in All Around the House, or, How to Make Homes Happy. Published in New York, 1881, by D. Appleton and Co.

Mrs. Beecher is not wrong, but I'm not sure why she makes this point. Maybe she wants people to better understand the suffering that some endure. Or maybe she thinks people should better appreciate the saintliness of some who endure suffering.

Or is Mrs. Beecher reminding us that such suffering could be in our own futures? If so, this is my comment: God doesn't want His children to obsess and prematurely grieve over the infinity of ills that the future could hold. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus talks about worry and asks, "Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?" and "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." 


Related:
The Lord is My Shepherd

How My Garage Sale Went

Logistics, tips, techniques, thoughts, experience

I took some vacation days last week and had a yard sale on Saturday. Oh, my, it was a lot of work! It was worth it, but I'm glad the kids helped. I don't think I could have done it without the muscle they provided.

Pricing and packaging

I priced everything in dollars or in multiples of 25¢ to simplify the money and the math. As much as possible, I used self-adhesive stickers. On clothing, I stuck the stickers to the tags and then stapled them to make sure they would stay. When there was no good place to put a sticker, I used a homemade tie-on tag, made of duct-tape-backed paper.

I put the clothing I was selling on hangers, because I despise piles of clothing at garage sales. I also don't like piles of sheets and curtains, so I folded the curtains and put them in plastic bags with descriptive labels, and I rolled the sheets and secured them with rubber bands.

Location, location, location!

I packed all the priced items in boxes and hauled them to my daughter Keely's house. She lives on the corner of a busy intersection in town. I thought that would be a better yard sale location than our home in the country. As Keely noted, the directions, "Turn off the paved road and...",  discourage the timid.

Because I felt the location was so good, I decided not to run a newspaper ad. Instead, I invested about $15 in ready-made garage-sale signs. I could have made them by hand, but I decided to go with convenience, durability, and neatness.

What I've described so far took from Tuesday through Friday to accomplish. After I got home from hauling boxes to Keely's on Friday night, I loaded the saw horses, tables, etc. on the truck and threw an old bicycle on top for good measure. Thank goodness for bungee cords.

Yard sale day

On Saturday, I got up at 4:30 a.m. (Ugh! For me, that's the middle of the night!) After a shower and a cup of coffee, I carefully drove the loaded truck to town.

Taurus, bless his heart, unloaded the tables and helped get everything set up. I used tablecloths so the merchandise would look more like treasures and less like trash. I also tried to put nearly everything on an elevated surface to make it easier to see and shop.

The photo above was taken about 7:00 a.m., just after we put out the signs. We put several signs along the two street-sides of the yard, and at the corner, we put a big box with a yard sale sign on each side so anyone who stopped at the intersection could see it. A large rock inside the box kept it in place.

The first customers arrived just a few minutes after the photo. I was a little dismayed when several people breezed through the sale without buying anything. I know now that the earliest shoppers are likely to be bargain hunters. They are in a hurry because they are hitting as many sales as possible, trying to skim the cream from each.

I posted several signs that said, "Please make an offer if it's priced too high," but most of the customers didn't bother to dicker. They were decisive and fairly quick. They walked through, and if they liked something they bought it. I think that means that my prices were either fair or cheap. It really doesn't matter; the fact is that they gave me money and took away something that I didn't want or need anymore.

Final clearance

About 1:00 p.m., Keely and I made a half-price table with many of the remaining items. We made a big sign, "Everything on this table 1/2 price", and hung it so it could be seen from the street.

The two highest-priced items I sold were $17.50 and $15.00. Nearly everything else was 50¢ or $1.00. When we closed the sale at about 3:00 p.m., I had taken in a little over $140. I had some expenses -- yard sale signs, a sheet of plywood -- but I won't have to buy them again for the yard sale that Keely says we're having next spring.

Some items didn't sell, and I sorted them as we packed up. I donated some things to the rummage sale that our church will be having in November, I put 2 boxes of things for next spring's yard sale in the shed. A few things came back into our house -- half a dozen books and several pieces of clothing that I decided to keep.

Lessons learned for the next sale

One thing I hope I do differently next time is to start preparations earlier. It took longer than I expected to sort out and price what I wanted to sell. I hope after the next sale that I feel like the entire house has been cleansed, not just a few rooms.

Another thing I learned is to have more $5 bills on hand. Just one roll of quarters would have been enough. I had more $1 bills than I needed. However, I had to send Keely to get a couple of $20 bills broken, late in the sale, because I ran out of $5 bills.

Shopping Season

Early signs of fall

The retailers are ready for a change in the weather.  Sweaters and blankets are on display in the malls; any remaining summer merchandise has been moved to the clearance aisle.

Pots of yellow and burgundy mums line the sidewalks at Kroger.  Mums are an obligatory autumn porch-and-yard decor in Kentucky.

Real pumpkins aren't ready yet, but you can buy a cute fake pumpkin at Lowes. And at the cash registers, a display of spray foam insulation for windows and doors reminds shoppers that it's time to get ready for cold weather.

Of course, this is just the prelude to the busiest retail season of the year. First it's Halloween, then Thanksgiving, followed by Christmas, and finally, the after-Christmas clearance sales.

Look for some very good buys this fall. The stores will be fiercely competing for the consumer's dollar. It is a good idea to buy early, if you see something you like at a reasonable price. Because of the economy, retailers aren't sure how much to order. In their effort not to overstock their warehouses, they may run out of items that sell better than expected.

That's my shopping advice for the season, and it's offered completely free of charge.

Vegetable Garden Architecture

Some of my garden hardware

I have a metal livestock fence panel -- a grid about 12 feet long and 5 feet tall. Recently, I've been growing cucumbers on it, but I've used it for pole beans in the past. I stand the panel up against three steel fence posts. I place a large stone under each end of the panel to lift it about 8 inches off the ground, and then I wire the panel to the posts. The space under the panel makes it easier to hoe or to mulch around the plants.

For the zucchinis, I use a long pallet that I picked up beside a dumpster some years ago. I lay it over the bed so the vines will grow up and lie on the pallet. My theory is that the zucchinis resist mildew and squash borers better with their vines off the ground. This method doesn't seem to deter the squash bugs, but they can be controlled somewhat by inspecting the leaves regularly and eliminating the eggs.

This year, I planted the tomatoes and peppers in groups of three. I gave each plant a cage and tied each group of cages to a steel fence post in their center. I do this because unsupported cages are likely to fall over in a rain or wind storm. The fence post eliminates this problem.

Related post:
My Experience with Tomato Cages and Stakes

A Lazy Gardener's Garden

Mulch is the answer.

This is my 17th (or 18th?) garden in Kentucky. I've only had the garden plowed once. All the other years, I've dug it up myself with a garden fork. I do recommend a fork for digging, rather than a spade. It is amazing how much easier it is to dig with a fork.

I have considered getting a rototiller, but it seems an extravagance that would just take up room in the shed. I would probably only use it once a year.

Mulching out the weeds

You see, I don't waste time and effort in cultivating soil I'm not going to plant. I put some kind of mulch over every part of the garden except the beds where my plants are growing. I like to keep the weeds and grass down with mulch because I am not fond of hoeing.

This year, I covered my entire garden with two large sheets of black plastic. The plastic is held down around the outer edge with some large cut stones we happen to have from a couple of old chimneys. I used scissors to cut large holes in the plastic where I wanted to make this year's beds. 

In each bed, I dug up the soil very well and enriched it with a humus/manure mix and a little lime before setting the plants. In a few weeks when the plants are bigger, I will mulch around them with straw. The rest of the garden (everywhere but the beds) is still covered with the black plastic.

I've also used newspaper as a mulch with good success. I put down a layer 6 to 8 sheets thick and covered it with enough straw to hold it in place. Some years, I've bought end-rolls of newsprint from the newspaper office for mulch -- 6 to 8 strips thick, weighed down with a little straw.

Work in the spring, and relax in the summer,

I work pretty hard for a few days to get the garden set up and planted, but after that, it doesn't require much effort. I wander through and look for tomato worms and squash bugs and pull up any bindweeds that are winding their way up the tomato cage legs.

The mulch around the plants helps keep the soil moist, so a good soaking about once a week is all they need. Mother Nature often takes care of it for me. (If I could just teach her to pick the tomatoes and bring them to the house, I could really take it easy.)

Sometime after frost, I pull up the plants. It is best to pull up any plastic at that time also, as it will probably start disintegrating over the winter.

These ideas certainly won't work for everyone or every situation, but they work for me.

Caution Advised

Beware of pranksters!

Remember -- today is April Fool's Day. Would-be tricksters are everywhere, so stay alert.

You may enjoy my Tree Notes post for today: "Jonathan Baldwin Turner and Osage orange hedges". No tricks are hidden there. It's just an interesting bit of history about the American prairies.

Substitute Frost Scrapers

Necessity is the mother of invention.

I'll pass this along in case anyone ever needs to know. In a pinch, a plastic dustpan will substitute for a frost scraper. It cleaned the windshield quite well for me a couple of mornings this week, and it seems unlikely to cause scratches.

The spatula works pretty well too, but I'm afraid I might scratch the glass with it. I mean the pancake-turner spatula, not the rubber-scraper spatula, of course. The rubber scraper doesn't work too well.

I do have a couple of real frost scrapers. I'm just not sure where they are. I think they were removed from the car when we went camping.

Homeowner Regrets We Don't Have

Houses we didn't buy

When Dennis was transferred to Fort Campbell, we became first-time home-buyers.  We were living out of suitcases in a hotel room with two little children, and Dennis was working midnights.  And we had a limited number of days that we could stay in the hotel with our expenses paid.  Naturally enough, we were desperate to find a place quickly.

Could have moved to Dover...
 
After our first session with a realtor, we thought about buying a little house near Dover, TN. It was an older home, but the owner had remodeled it nicely. It sat on five acres, and it had a small horse barn. A little creek ran through the back yard, barely fifty feet behind the house. We liked the house, but it just didn't have enough bedrooms for us.

Now that I'm enlightened about how streams can rise in this country, I am thankful that we didn't buy that house. I'll bet that little stream gets out of its banks frequently. Every time it rained heavily, I would have worried about the kids falling into that flooded creek!

Could have moved to Lafayette...

We looked at another group of houses with another realtor, and we liked a little house in southwest Christian County, near Lafayette, KY. In some ways, it was the house I'd always wanted. It was white with a big front porch. The rooms were fairly large, and there was an old-fashioned feel to the place. However, there was hardly a tree on the five acres, and the neighbor just over the fence had the most junk piled in his yard that I've ever seen around a dwelling.

Despite its shortcomings, we tried to bid on that little white house, but someone else got a bid in first and bought it. It's just as well. The junky neighbor next door would have been a perpetual irritation, and without trees, that little house must have been like an oven in the summer sun.

But here we are, instead

Instead, we bought the house where we live -- a brick ranch house built in the 1960s. We've had various homeowner problems, but one thing we've never worried about is flooding. Our little property is located on the edge of a broad ridge. A steep quarter-mile downhill slope starts at the edge of our front lawn. Excess surface water can't help draining away. It gets soggy up here sometimes, but we'll never be flooded. 

Another thing we've never worried about is junky neighbors. Our two nearest neighbors are Mennonites. Their farmyards are quite tidy. We try to keep our grass mowed so they won't be embarassed when their Mennonite friends visit. Thank goodness we only mow about an acre. I wonder why we ever thought we wanted five acres?

When our children think back about their childhoods, I think they'll remember the trees here. Their playhouses were under the big old trees where the log house once stood. Their swing, hung from a high branch, carried them over the bank and high into the open air. They lay on the trampoline on summer evenings and watched the hummingbirds in the mimosa blossoms. They raked huge leaf piles in the fall and played in them.  And how could they forget all the acorns and tree seedlings their dad has planted and how the new trees have grown over the years?

This is the story of how God led us to a house that was right for us. It's not a palace, but it was a good place for our kids to grow up.  We hope to continue living here for quite a while.  Now that we own the place free and clear,  Dennis says the only way they're moving him out of here is in a pine box.

Dieting Over the Holidays

The retail diet plan

I have a helpful hint for anyone who wants to avoid weight gain over the winter holidays. It's a simple hint, but I swear that it worked for me -- just work 35-40 hours a week at a busy retail store.

I lost ten pounds between November 10 and January 10. I ate my usual peanut butter and toast for breakfast, and I took a sandwich to work for lunch. That was conservative enough, but every night when I got home from work, I enjoyed supper and a liberal amount of homemade Christmas candy.

When I went to the doctor in mid-December, he told me to keep my job because it was good for me. My cholesterol was up a little (probably from the Christmas candy!) but I had actually lost some weight. I have to get a cholesterol re-check in a couple of months, but I expect it to be OK now that the Christmas candy is all gone.

The retail worker's day is full of light exercise, done quickly -- lifting, walking, carrying, reaching, bending, kneeling, climbing, etc. At my store, if you're on the clock you're standing, even if you aren't working. All in all, it's the most effective weight-loss plan I've ever experienced.

To be honest, if I hadn't been working, I would have spent a good portion of November and December sitting at my computer, where I burn a minimum of calories! I usually gain at least 5 pounds over the holidays. I do agree with the doctor that my job has been good for my health, though it certainly has cut into my blogging time!

A Set of Oxymorons

Double dose of contradictions

I love the small print at the bottom of the banner: "First time customers only." The second time you're a customer, the oxymorons do not apply.

In truth, these money lenders aren't funny. They say they're providing a service to people who don't have other resources. That may be true, but when people get started with check advances, it's hard for them to escape from the trap. The interest rates are exorbitant. The customer may repay the loan and interest after he gets his check -- but then he has to get another loan to make it to the next check.

An Idea for Table Decorations

Inexpensive but attractive

One of the ladies at our church is truly talented at decorating and entertaining for a crowd. She's had plenty of practice. Every Christmas, she has a big open house at her home with a wonderful buffet. It's a very nice holiday event. She always has a big crowd. She explained once that she isn't good at sending Christmas cards, so she has an open house instead.

This lady did the table decorations at church for the anniversary dinner, and I thought what she used was interesting. It looks nice, but still, the components aren't anything particularly expensive.

The squares of color are paper napkins in autumn colors, spread out, and the same napkins are used inside the "vases" that hold the sparkly sprigs. The small glass containers had tea lights in them. None of the glassware matches, but it still looks great. The confetti serves as sort of a table runner.

I am not good at thinking up thinks like this, but I admire people who can!

Technorati tags: autumn table decorations, banquet table decorations, table decor

Another Bagged Spinach Recall

Salmonella found in fresh spinach bagged by Metz Fresh

Over 8000 cases of fresh bagged spinach were recalled today by Metz Fresh LLC of King City, Calif. A single sample on their lines tested positive for salmonella, but they're recalling the entire batch.

90% of the recalled bags of spinach is still in the warehouses and won't be released. The rest of it is -- well, somewhere else. If you have fresh spinach on hand, you should check whether it fits this description:

The recall covers 10- and 16-ounce bags, as well as 4-pound cartons and cartons that contain four 2.5-pound bags, with the following tracking codes: 12208114, 12208214 and 12208314.

Source: "Salmonella Scare Prompts Spinach Recall", by staff, Associated Press, August 30, 2007.

I tried to visit the Metz Fresh website, but the page wouldn't open. Possibly, their server has crashed due to a sudden influx of visitors! However, you can still visit the Google cache of the Metz Fresh website.

I feel sorry for Metz Fresh -- no company wants this kind of publicity -- but I applaud them for issuing an extensive recall that should (we all hope!) take care of the problem.

I checked the news for what was going on with spinach after the blog got a few hits from people searching for "Netz spinach recall" and "Netz contaminated spinach." They need to search for "Metz," not "Netz" (which is my last name, you know.) The search engines were sending them to "Bagged Spinach Warning," a post I wrote a year ago when E. coli bacteria took fresh spinach off the market for a while.

Technorati tags: spinach recall, bagged spinach warning, Metz Fresh

Roadkill: Better Avoided than Regretted

Watch out for the animals!

I've heard many roadkill jokes, but to me, it's not a very funny topic. I feel terrible when I hit something, so I really try to let the little animals and birds get out of the way of my car.

Today, I am sad that I hit a cardinal. I suppose he took flight as best he could when the car startled him. He came up from the side of the road right into the front wheel of my car.

I've often wondered if people were shocked that motorized vehicles killed so many more wild animals than horse-drawn vehicles did. Or was the increase in roadkill so gradual over the years that nobody really noticed how bad it was getting?

Birds on the highway

Birds fly like airplanes. When they take off, they have to fly forward. Most species of birds can't lift themselves straight up from the ground like a helicopter. This means that when birds on the highway try to get out of the way, they may fly straight at you! I know this, and I slow down for birds, but I didn't see that cardinal today until he flew out of the ditch.

A group of vultures gathered around roadkill on the highway can be dangerous. Some of them will probably take off in your direction. When their bellies are full, they have a hard time going airborne and gaining altitude. I have heard that it's very disgusting to have a vulture disgorge in your car after it comes through your windshield.

Wild turkeys also have a hard time rising up from the ground and flying. Last year, a wild turkey broke out a school bus window in Connecticut.

Helping turtles cross the road

Isaac has always had an affectionate concern for turtles. If he sees one crossing the road, he likes to move it to the side of the road in the direction that it was headed. (By the way, if you ever pick up a turtle and he pees, be sure to put him down in an area where he can replenish his liquid within a short time.)

One day we were driving along one of our rural blacktops, and we saw a turtle about halfway across the road. I stopped, and Isaac got out to move him. He bent over to pick up the turtle, and the turtle went into attack mode! He stood up tall on all four legs and lunged at Isaac with his mouth open (as well as a turtle can lunge, that is.)

Clearly, the turtle wouldn't be picked up, so Isaac thought he could drag the turtle off the road if he would snap on a stick. The turtle wasn't fooled by a stick; he was determined to use his snap power on Isaac. So we abandoned the rescue and motored away. If we hadn't stopped, the turtle probably could have walked across the road in less time than it took him to scare off Isaac!

Drive defensively to avoid collisions with wildlife.

Many wild animals are active at dawn and dusk, because they're out looking for food and water. Unfortunately, it's hard to see them on the roads in the dim light between full night and full day. All you can do is slow down and be alert.

When you're driving at night and you see eyes reflecting in your headlights, there's a good chance that a freaked-out, light-dazed animal will run into the path of your vehicle. If you're alert to that possibility, maybe you can avoid hitting it.

And please, watch out for the possums. I think they must be the most-often-killed animal along western Kentucky's roadways. They have a hard time thinking what to do when they're frightened. In fact, panic can make their brains short out, so have some patience and a little extra care for them.

Collisions with Deer

Hey, try to avoid hitting a deer (or a moose or an elk or a bear.) It will wreck your car, and injure or kill the animal, and you could be injured or killed too!

The worst time for deer on the roads is coming up soon. Their breeding season in Kentucky is October through January. They are naturally silly from their hormones during this time, and also, their routines and habits are disrupted by hunters.

Be especially wary when driving through areas where the road is lined by woods. If you see one deer, there are probably others nearby. They may decide to follow the one you saw. They are particularly active at dawn and dusk, but you can see them anytime.

Deer behave erratically when they're befuddled by bright headlights. They might start across the road and then change directions and run back. It's better to stop (if possible) than to try to dodge them.

One last story, and I'm done with this topic. Our Mennonite neighbor has several sons -- young, single guys who are old enough to go places and stay out late. One of the boys was coming home on his bicycle late at night. A deer jumped out of the ditch directly in front of him and he couldn't avoid it. He ran right into it and both he and the deer fell down. The deer got up and ran away, and fortunately our neighbor boy wasn't hurt other than scrapes and bruises. He recuperated a little, and then he got back on his bike and pedaled home.

There's some kind of a lesson to that story, but I'm not sure what it is. Maybe it's just that you never know what will happen next!

Technorati tags: roadkill, collisions with wild animals, wildlife killed on roads, defensive driving,

Five Steps of Home Improvement

Ideas from 1923 for making your home place look and function better

These five steps to a convenient and attractive home place are from a 1923 Agriculture textbook, (The New Agriculture for High Schools by Kary Cadmus Davis, Ph, D.) Dr. Davis's five steps are listed below in the order that they should be undertaken:

1. Clean up the place and put it in order as much as you can.

2. Study the current situation and think how it could be improved by re-planning or by adding new features.

3. Carry out the proposed improvements.

4. Add trees, shrubs and other plants to shade, beautify, delineate, and disguise.

5. Install modern conveniences.

Dr. Davis was writing about the improvement of a farm's home place, which would include barns, barnyards, chicken house, orchard, house, etc. However, his steps could be applied to any sort or size of home, anywhere.

I like his recommendation to make the most of what is there, first. Before you start spending money, put some elbow grease into it and really clean up the place. That can be a big improvement!

The "re-planning" he mentions in step 2 might include some "re-purposing", as we say today -- that is, simply thinking about the best way to use what you have to meet your needs and to improve the appearance of the place where you live.

I've watched Mennonite families set up farming operations in old farm buildings that weren't in the best of shape. It is interesting that they proceed much as outlined above.

First, they clean up the place, get the grass mowed, take care of the fences, nail down the loose boards, etc. Then, as money permits, they add the most necessary improvements first.

In the case of one of our Mennonite neighbors, he built a big machine shed for his tractor repair business as soon as they moved in. The old house looked pretty rough for a few years, but now they have put vinyl siding on it, and are in the process of building on a few rooms.

The modern conveniences that Dr. Davis suggested for step 5 were running water, bathroom equipment, electric lights and irrigation. That was in 1923. We think of most of those as necessities 85 years later!

In 2007, the modern conveniences we'd like might be a refrigerator with ice and water in the door, a home theater, or a hot tub. They're not necessities and everyone doesn't have them, but they'd be nice. I imagine that Dr. Davis would like us pay cash for our modern conveniences rather than purchasing them on credit, too.

The benefits of home improvement? Dr. Davis lists three:

1. For the members of the family -- better satisfaction with home surroundings, improvement and conservation of health, a valuable education for its younger members.
2. For the community -- good example.
3. For the place itself -- enhanced value.

Source: The New Agriculture for High Schools, by Kary Cadmus Davis, Ph.D. (Cornell). Published in Philadelphia by the J.B. Lippincott Company, in 1923. From the chapter titled "Improvement Projects" (p. 303).

Technorati tags: home improvement tips, remodeling advice, home improvement steps, how to improve your home

How to Write Better, According to Me

A hard-to-read sentence in a newspaper article

The quotation below is a sentence from an AP article about J. K. Rowling, author of the Harry Potter series. It was written by Jill Lawless, a busy foreign correspondent whose editor should have intervened here, but didn't.

Just try reading this aloud.

Rowling (her name rhymes with bowling, rather than howling), looking relaxed in jeans and a sweater, shoulder-length blonde hair stylishly cut, has wildly mixed emotions at leaving behind the character she conjured up during a train journey across England in 1990: a neglected, bespectacled orphan who learns on his 11th birthday that he is a wizard.

If I were her editor, that long sentence would have been broken into two sentences. I would have slightly reworded it to get rid of two awkward phrases and an adjective that looks better than it sounds. The result would be something like this:

Rowling, whose name rhymes with bowling, looked relaxed in jeans and a sweater, shoulder-length blonde hair stylishly cut. She has wildly mixed emotions at leaving behind the character she conjured up during a 1990 train journey across England: a neglected orphan with spectacles who learns on his 11th birthday that he is a wizard.

Isaac says, "Well, Mom, your version's not as journalistic." Maybe not, but it's easier to read. He does have a point, though. I'm not a journalist. I'm just a woman with a blog.

Technorati tags: better writing, how to write, bad sentence

How to Patch the Knees of Jeans

Repair a hole in fabric

If you have the time to do it, a neat patch on a damaged garment returns it to useful service, saves you money and gives you a nice glow of pride in your handwork.

Here are the basics of repairing a worn out knee with a patch that is hemmed on both sides. These same ten steps can be used to patch a hole in virtually any fabric item.

1. Following the threads in the denim, cut off the frazzled edges so that the hole is square or rectangular in shape.

2. From an old pair of jeans, cut a patch that is one inch larger on all sides than the hole you are repairing. The edges of the patch should follow the threads in the cloth. Cut a 1/4-inch square out of each corner of the patch.

3. Put the patch inside the jeans leg and center it beneath the hole. Be sure the right side of the fabric is showing through the hole. Pin it securely.

4. Baste the patch in place, running the stitches about 3/4 inch from the edge of the hole.

5. From the right side of the knee, make a 1/4-inch diagonal cut in each of the four corners of the hole. (See image below.)

6. On each side of the hole, fold the fabric to the inside. Baste the folded edge to the patch.

7. Turn the jeans inside out. Remove the basting stitches from the outside edge of the patch.

8. Fold the edge of the patch under on all four sides. Baste the folded edges to the jeans. (See image below.)

9. Press the patch smoothly, lifting the iron up and down rather than sliding it across the fabric.

10. Stitch the edges down on both sides by hand with a hemming stitch, or sew around all edges with your sewing machine. Remove all basting stitches.

When my children were young, I bought a lot of their jeans at garage sales. Often I found jeans that were in excellent condition except for holes in the knees. I bought them for a small price and patched them. It was a good way to save a lot of money.

The Slang Habit Is A Vicious Thing

History And Old Stuff...

I have a new old book. It is an 8th-grade reading textbook from 1931, The Roundup, published by The John C. Winston Co. of Chicago. The following passage is excerpted from an article by Maria Leach, titled "Slang and Slang". Here, Maria tells us what she really thinks.

Is your mind, too, such a single-track mind that everything you see is either "cute or "darling"? Do you say a poem is great, your breakfast was great, or your teacher is great? Do you say the weather is fierce, your lessons are fierce, and your teacher is fierce?

If you talk like this, everybody will know that your mind is a shabby thing. If you have only one or two words to describe the world and all the vastly different things and people in it, your speech will betray not only poverty of vocabulary, but poverty of mind...

Words like fine and fierce, in fact all blanket words which are used to cover a multitute of things, belong to one of the most objectionable types of slang. Such silly remarks as jazz baby, sweet papa, and you know me, Al, are labels of a shallow and second-hand wit. And a too free use of slang prevents the mind from acquiring a command over legitimate English.

The "slang habit" is a vicious thing. Not only does it keep a shallow mind shallow, but almost all slang grows cheap by constant use and eventually belittles the things it aims to enhance.

-Maria Leach

Well, then. Let us avoid silly, repetitive slang so Maria Leach can rest peacefully in her grave. Really, I'm surprised she didn't say that such slang would rot your teeth and stunt your growth!

To give the lady credit, she did write in the first part of the article about picturesque, vigorous slang, which she liked because it enriches the language. Some of her examples of acceptable slang are listed below. I've added definitions for a few that may be unfamiliar.

to cross swords to parry a thrust to wrestle with a problem to be in high feather (in good spirits) to show the white feather (betray your low breeding by being cowardly or slothful) to have a yellow streak bleachers sweater skyscraper speak-easy moonshiner hustle

stunt to give one's self away by hook or crook to show one's hand to be aboveboard car-whacker (mechanic) flivver (old car) tin Lizzie step on it close-up fade-out flash-back wirepulling hard-boiled (emotionally callous)

Technorati tags: slang, language, words

Meeting People and Making Small Talk

And What I Think About It...

Guy Kawasaki has posted an interesting article: "The Art of Schmoozing II." He has ten tips from Susan RoAne for walking into a room and meeting people. RoAne is the author of How to Work a Room: Your Essential Guide to Savvy Socializing.

Ms. RoAne's ten suggestions are applicable to nearly any social event where you will be meeting people you don't know. I intend to take the list to Sunday School with me to discuss from the viewpoint of meeting and greeting visitors to church.

I especially liked the last suggestion:

Go everywhere with the intention of having fun. People want to be around the upbeat, fun, interesting, and interested person.